"Mid-Life?"

As you may notice, my posts come few and far between. Typically that's because I give great thought to what I write. Unfortunately that means I'll write, save, rewrite, save, revise, save and then (finally) publish. Sorry for that, but I hope that means what you read is well thought-out.

Today I cannot hold my tongue any longer on the concept of what I'll call; living the dream. So here goes.

Growing up I somehow got the impression that living the dream meant big house, fancy cars, lots of money, kids and vacations. My parents didn't do this to me, I just think I must have seen so much of those things around me, on tv and in movies that I believed that must be what would bring happiness. This belief resulted in my going through many financial ups and downs over the years. I've accumulated lots of nice things and had to relinquish some of them in order to get through some of the lean times. Every "lean time" showed me how little all those "things" really mattered. It has taken a long time (and lots of money) to get where I am today; getting by, but not exactly wealthy.

***Right here I want to stop and say that my early perceptions played a role in my having high expectations and high standards. That, to some extent, has been a very good thing. I've been fortunate to hold positions normally filled by people with more education than me. It has also meant I pursue knowledge where some might not be concerned and I love having a great deal of knowledge. It has also translated into attracting some very intelligent people into my life…and that is a good thing.

Today I believe firmly in financial guru Dave Ramsey's "live like no one else today so you can live like no one else tomorrow" philosophy. Now, that doesn't mean I'm actually doing everything Ramsey suggests.

I say all of the above, to segue into the meat of what I now realize.

The farther you can live below your "means" and still be happy, the better off you will be in the long run. See, when I was going through the years of becoming a homeowner (the 1990's) we were told to buy the most house we could qualify for (re; mortgage payment). Being a veteran, I had the benefit of not needing any down payment. Most people would consider that a blessing and I've really liked both houses we've owned. However, it also means minimal equity for a longer period of time. Furthermore, you are then pressured to always make at least as much money as you were when you bought the house. So much for surviving a down economy, major medical illness or just wanting a career change.

Take stock of your long-term goals early. Work for them. Once you get married, it ain't as easy as Dave Ramsey says. A married couple must agree on finances, just like parents must agree on decisions for their children. Getting two minds to agree is not always as easy as the young-and-in-love couple thinks.

I really believe most of us have been duped into believing we should be able to eat out a lot, take lavish vacations, have 3+ flat screen tv's, expensive cars and the latest clothes.

I say "duped" because we now have all these "conveniences" that are supposed to make us more productive and free up time, but we spend less time together as a family. We are living so "high on the hog" in our everyday life, we often can't afford to take even the cheap vacations, hence the "staycation." We also are spending so much money on today, that I fear much of the American population will be dirt poor in their retirement years. This will be a major shift from today's seniors who  saved and in some cases, had pensions (before the advent of the 401k).

After living with many of the luxuries my parents would've thought out of reach, I'd be willing to live in a double-wide (or manufactured) home for less money, if it meant I got to be with my family more, take vacations and had more disposable income.

I've had the benefit of living above my means and below my means. I can say with absolute certainty, living below your means has numerous benefits all the toys in the world can't make up for.